At a woeful length of more than two hours, Tombstone does not bode well for the future of westerns. It’s as moribund as the name of the Arizona town that gives the movie its title.
A big cast, orange sunsets, galloping horses, lots of spitting and a handful of truly bad performances are what the film has to offer. Then there’s Val Kilmer, who nearly redeems this sub-mediocrity. As Doc Holliday, the fastest draw and surest shot in the whole territory, he is more than a savior on the right side of the law. He’s also a Southern gentleman known for witty verbal asides and courage that belies his physically weakened state.
Besides the estimable Kilmer, Kurt Russell has a few golden moments as former lawman Wyatt Earp. He reunites with brothers Virgil (Sam Elliott) and Morgan (Bill Paxton) in Tombstone, along with their wives. The plan is to settle in this mining town and get rich.
But just like Al Pacino in The Godfather III, Wyatt keeps being drawn back in the life he left behind. There’s a band of trigger-happy madmen who wear red sashes around their waists and call themselves cowboys. They bring trouble to Tombstone. They must be stopped, even if the brothers Earp must put greed on the back burner.
For unintentional comedy, there is Dana Delany’s awful performance as Josephine, an itinerant actress who fancies Wyatt despite his having a wife. “Are you happy?” Josephine asks him when they’re alone in a field of flowers.
The other woman in Wyatt’s life is no better. Dana Wheeler-Nicholson plays his wife Mattie, perhaps the first drug addict in Arizona history.
In case you forget, the villains are sweaty, sunburned and unshaven. They also have the license to act crazy. Powers Boothe, as cowboy Curly Bill, leaves an opium den suitably high, conducts an invisible orchestra and howls at the moon.
There’s no way to account for the truly silly verbal showdown between Doc Holliday and Johnny Ringo (Michael Biehn). “In vino veritas,” says Doc, a reference to the truth-telling properties from drinking wine. Ringo counters with another Latin phrase. Then it’s back to Doc to top him.
When Wyatt does decide to become a lawman again, blood flows big-time. He and his four cohorts find the cowboys wherever they are, in barbershops and whorehouses, shooting them dead on the spot. The high quotient of gore is attributable to director George P. Cosmatos, who also made Rambo: First Blood Part II and Cobra. Subtle he is not.
Now we know why westerns died out.
